Delete. Next moment, please.

I would like to have one moment where I don't have to think about autism.  One moment where I'm not plotting how to rescue him.  How can I make him better?  How do I get him to stop yelling?  Why is he a Jekyll and Hyde this week and not last week?  What is triggering him to hurl his trains across the room?  Why won't he eat?  Why won't he stop yelling?  Should I take him off dairy? wheat? sugar?  Where is the closest hyperbaric chamber?  Why won't he stop yelling?  Did vaccines give him autism?  Did I give him autism?  Will he ever be "normal"?  Why is he afraid of other children?  Why won't he stop yelling?  Maybe a support group will help.  Will I ever be able to finish a thought? a task? a sentence?  When will he stop repeating himself and make me repeat after him?  Why won't he stop yelling?  When will I be able to potty train him?  Why won't he eat carrots?  When will my heart stop racing?  When will he know his name?  Why won't he stop yelling?  When will I stop fighting for him?  Never.


Delete.  Next moment, please.